Well, here we are facing a new year and I am spending the day doing some electronic 'house cleaning' before I go to the gym and attempt to keep my first and only resolution. I'd like to wish you all a happy and healthy New Year - I hope that 2017 is everything you need… Continue reading Moving Energy
In the course of couple’s therapy I am almost always investigating the extent to which the couple is navigating their partnership. As may be imagined, the entire model of ‘partnership’ is generally broken when a couple is in crisis. It becomes essential then to reestablish parameters and potentially renegotiate how their partnership looks and works.… Continue reading Partnerships Defined – the anatomy of a good relationship
I can’t keep track of how many times a week I talk about removing the word YOU from statements when people are talking to one another and most importantly, the phrase “you make me”…. Let’s face it… in most cases NO ONE is MAKING you … anything. When we use the vernacular “you make me”… Continue reading No One is “Making” you….
One of the more recent labels popularized by psychology pop culture is the term “abandonment”. Clients will frequently start an introductory session with “I have abandonment issues” but it’s rare that they truly understand how those “issues” play out in defensive responses and/or daily behavior. Abandonment by definition refers to being ‘left’ and is clearly… Continue reading You Left Me…. Consequences of Feeling Abandoned
Occasionally along our growth journey we may get 'stuck' and I often discover it's related to our unwillingness to OWN some element of our 'selves' - one of those little hidden 'secrets' that keeps us wading through bouts of internal shame and feeling "not good enough". Rarely is it black and white or out there… Continue reading Step One: OWN it!
This is the second post inspired by Dr. Brenee Brown’s TED talk on Vulnerability. One of the statements she made was regarding ‘shame’ was “the less you talk about it – the more you have it”; a statement I feel needs more discussion. Occasionally, clients will talk about having a ‘secret’, something they’ve held onto… Continue reading Ditch the Secret – Talk About It!
We’ve grown up and now exist within a culture where ‘comfort’ is coveted. We keep our homes at comfortable temperatures; we purchase comfortable sofas, and buy extra padding for our beds. Our clothing is encouraged to be comfortable and there is a common distaste for pieces that restrict; corsets, neckties, stilettos, and whitey tighties. We… Continue reading Get Uncomfortable and Grow!