I often witness conversational exchanges between two people where one of the individuals expresses themselves by harshly criticizing the other: “You are always telling lies” “You don’t have any self-respect” “You never listen” “I can never trust you” “That was a dumb mistake” And so on. I will usually observe this type of exchange long… Continue reading A Slow and Painful Death
In the course of couple’s therapy I am almost always investigating the extent to which the couple is navigating their partnership. As may be imagined, the entire model of ‘partnership’ is generally broken when a couple is in crisis. It becomes essential then to reestablish parameters and potentially renegotiate how their partnership looks and works.… Continue reading Partnerships Defined – the anatomy of a good relationship
One of the things I hear A LOT when I work with couples is that “things have changed from when we were first together”. Let’s be realistic, relationships change. As we become more familiar with one another and move through our ‘histories’ – we, as people, change. We make assumptions, we project, and we may… Continue reading Benefits of Having a Snuggle Buddy – How 5 Minutes a Day Can Change Your Relationship
Occasionally along our growth journey we may get 'stuck' and I often discover it's related to our unwillingness to OWN some element of our 'selves' - one of those little hidden 'secrets' that keeps us wading through bouts of internal shame and feeling "not good enough". Rarely is it black and white or out there… Continue reading Step One: OWN it!
My brother recently married and with wedding season about to step into full swing I thought it appropo to share here, some of the sisterly (dusted with professional) advice that was offered. Whether you are about to be married or are deep into the commitment, the following can serve as a reminder for those little… Continue reading When Forever Feels Like A Long Time – Thoughts about Marriage
This is the second post inspired by Dr. Brenee Brown’s TED talk on Vulnerability. One of the statements she made was regarding ‘shame’ was “the less you talk about it – the more you have it”; a statement I feel needs more discussion. Occasionally, clients will talk about having a ‘secret’, something they’ve held onto… Continue reading Ditch the Secret – Talk About It!
We’ve grown up and now exist within a culture where ‘comfort’ is coveted. We keep our homes at comfortable temperatures; we purchase comfortable sofas, and buy extra padding for our beds. Our clothing is encouraged to be comfortable and there is a common distaste for pieces that restrict; corsets, neckties, stilettos, and whitey tighties. We… Continue reading Get Uncomfortable and Grow!